His Name is Zion

The name Zion is written in the bible 168 times. Zion is a city in Jerusalem, a mountain on a hill and another name for heaven. Zion is what writers call Ethiopia and believe it or not, Tsion (Zion) was the name of the girl who met me at the airport and carried my bags to the hotel.

Zion is, was, and forever will be the name of my first son, born on this day April 15, 2002. I checked into the hospital and after 27 hours of labor delivered, him, held him and had to let him go. I left the hospital the following day with a bag of memories, tokens, and certificates to prove that he was here. I left that day not knowing what my future would hold.

Since April 15, 2002 the days immediately preceding and the days immediately following are sometimes struggle. Without being conscious of it, there have been times that the longing sweeps over me in waves. In 2003, I decided that I each year on April 15, that I would attempt to do those things that I would not have otherwise had the courage to do. That first year on April 15, 2003 I was shocked to find myself sitting in a room coaching the CEO and the entire executive team of a large restaurant chain -- miraculous. On April 15, 2004 I was in New Haven, CT teaching a 3-day class at Yale University -- improbable. April 15, 2005 I was invited to as one of two consultants to deliver diversity training to the executive team at one of those large battery companies that we all know so well -- impossible. I remember how hard it was getting on the plane that day and getting prepare once I landed. It's the day that I sat in the parking lot and heard Mary, Mary singing, "I Cried My Last Tear Yesterday." I can pretty much tell you where I was and what I was doing on this day every since 2002 and it wasn't my taxes. On April 15, 2008, I packed away all of Zion's things for the last time. All that there was of him was still in the bag from the hospital and over the years I would take things out, look at them, read them, and put them away.

Some things in life are difficult to explain like why some children live and others die too soon. Why some born in Ethiopia triumph over all the odds against them and those born here in the states in world class hospital just don't have the strength to survive. All of us have stories and how we found ourselves on this path varies from person to person. It seems that my journey begins and ends with Zion and it's difficult to explain why this long, winding, wonderful, laborious journey could some how deliver me to this date. At first I thought it ironic that God would have my children's lives so intertwined by these dates and then I thought of David who told me last year; that whenever you go full circle you get a new beginning. That must be it, I thought one chapter of my life as a mother is being closed on April 15 and another one opened on April 16. But, then I realize yet one more bit of irony, when my case is heard in Ethiopia I believe that it will still be April 15 here in Chicago.

It's difficult to tell you all this without filling in the details or writing in my more usual style. Forgive me, please I just want to get it down to mark the significance of this day. From the day that I learned that there is a church in Axum, Ethiopia that hold the Arc of the Covenant, and that the name of that church is St. Mary's of Zion I was drawn to that place. Without being able to explain it to you, in August 2007 when I started this journey, I knew that whatever questions and unresolved issues and longing that I had would be answered and filled when my feet touched the soil in Ethiopia. Remember I went there in December and from the moment I touched down, I was drawn into an unexplainable set of events. I think it was the first time that I'd truly exhaled in nearly seven years. It was a release that I will never be able to explain.

When I walked into the courtyard on the other side of that big blue gate, I thought that I would be overcome by emotion. Instead I saw my children and instantly new that all I had believed was indeed true. All of my unanswered questions were answered in an instant and instead of being overcome with emotions, I exhaled again and felt a rush of peace come over me. When I prayed on the prayer bench of the church, I felt peace. When I walked into the palace I felt peace. When I walked through the streets of Addis I was at peace. When I held my children and looked into their eyes I was at peace. When I said goodbye to them that last day, I was at peace. I've carried that feeling with me from that time to this. Rather than feeling the anxiety or anxiousness, I feel peace.

Today on April 15, 2009 I wait patiently to do yet one more thing that I thought would be impossible to do. I wait to hear the words that I thought I'd never hear and wait to tell the world what I thought I'd never say. This impossible thing has been made possible and all things thought improbable have passed away. Now, I no longer wonder what I will do on all the April 15ths to come. I know that I will celebrate this new beginning.

This is the eve of my new beginning and all I feel is peace. I love you all so much thank you from the bottom of my heart for every kind word and every prayer that you have prayed for me. God always sends his angels to protect, shield, and guide, because of each of you, I've come full circle and this is a new beginning. So wherever you are just say a quick thank you to God because it is already written it is already done.

Hebrews 12:22 But you have come to Mount Zion, to the heavenly Jerusalem, the city of the living God. You have come to thousands upon thousands of angels in joyful assembly.

Peace Be Still
Come on with peace. I'm talking about peace. Peace be still. In your home, peace. On your job, peace. Late in the midnight hour... peace be still. Whenever the Lord says peace, I guarantee there'll be peace. I know that it will be. Peace, oh peace. When there's confusion, whenever the Lord says peace, there'll be peace, you'll have peace. Peace, oh, oh peace. When you don't know which way to turn, He guarantees that there will be peace. I'm not worried about it. Peace, oh, oh peace. If I don't have nothing else, whenever the Lord says peace, I've got peace in my heart and peace down in my soul. Peace, oh, oh peace...

This Time I Won

I've been playing online poker for about four years. It's on the Bravo TV site and it's always free (I'd never play for money). I'm not a gambler at all, I'm too tight with money for that but it's how wind down sometimes. They have daily tournaments at 5, 7, 10, 12 midnight and 2am. I play just to unwind at the end of the day a few times a week. In a tournament there are usually between 200 - 300 people playing and when you win you get to play in a championship tournament. Over the years I've probably won 3 or 4 times but never played for the championship.

To play you have to have focus, patience, and make good decision making. If I've got too much on my mind I can't play well, if I'm stressed, or pissed off, I can't play well. Going through the adoption stressed and pissed means I've lost many times and in the early rounds.

Monday night I won the 10pm qualifying tournament! It wouldn't be that big of a deal except now they now pay the championship winner $5,000! The championship game is April 26 and I will be in it. $5,000 can pay for my trip back to ET or summer camp for the kids. Well, it might be a down payment on summer camp but I'll tell you about that later.

You Don't Really Have a Referral

Over the last few weeks I've read several Yahoo and blog post of families that say they have had referrals since September or earlier but have no medicals or court dates yet. I've learned some valuable lessons in my year and a half of this adoption journey. There are some things that many of us have painfully learned too late. I know that most of my blog readers have been around as long as me but for those that are a bit newer, this is an important lesson that I want to share with you.

If your agency has sent you a picture of a child that is NOT a referral. If you do not have a medical record and if you have not signed and notarized referral papers you do NOT have a referral. This is especially true if you are looking at being matched with waiting children. You have simply been matched. You are being considered as a candidate to parent the child. While there are some procedural differences with agencies this is something that is fairly consistent across the board.

Why is having the medical record important to the process and why does not having one signal a potential issue?

Children living in orphanages are under the guardianship of that particular orphanage they are not the wards (using an American term) of your agency. If a child has been identified to you the agency may or may not have yet completed a contract with the orphanage for that particular child. Before you can get a medical record or more specific information, there must be a contract for a specific child made between your agency and the orphanage where the child currently resides. Facilitators work with the orphanages to identify children and then the agency pays a fee to that orphanage to take guardianship of the child. The adoption agencies cannot leagally run an orphanage that is why they operate care centers that serve as a transition point for children being adopted. Children are usually moved from an orphanage to a care center after a contract for the child has been signed, after the fees have been paid, and in many cases not until AFTER potential parents have been identified.

Part of that contracting process includes getting a current physical and medical record created. This is where there may be some variation. Your agency may just give you a medical check-up form that was performed on the child while they were living in the orphanage but in most cases, the medical record is created as part of the contracting processes. It may not be done until the child is in the care or under the legal guardianship of your agency. Once the children are moved the agency then begins assuming the cost for the child. This is the point where some agencies charge a fee to the families for "foster care."

Why might that be a concern?

It's a concern for a few reasons. If you do not have a medical record it may be that your agency does not have legal rights yet for the child. Without that signed contract between orphanage and agency there is a chance that the child may go to another agency, that there is another family somewhere looking at the same picture, or even that the child will even go back to their family of origin. It means that you will wait for many, many months and not actually get that child or that the child in the picture ultimately may not be legally available for adoption. Another issue may be significant issues with the paperwork that passes between the orphange and the agency. The paperwork may need to be authorized, verified, or approved by local kebele's (local governments) before the transfer can take place. If you find yourself in this situation; wondering why you can't get standard documentation, you may find that the agency reps providing many reasons why the information and medical records are not available. Just know that without it you do not have secured referral and anything can happen including the fact that you may not be able to adopt that child.

Here are some parameters that may help you. In a normal case it should not take more than 2-4 weeks between the match with the child and the medical report being produced with formal referral acceptance papers. If you are in your second, third, or fourth month of waiting after being matched and you have not seen that documentation you should be concerned. The problem is that once you have that picture in your hand and you are being told stories about the children it is not easy to give them up. You want to believe everything that you are being told even though your gut tells you that something is wrong.

You have a couple of options; you can accept the match knowing that what I've written is a posibility or you can wait until you have the medicals in hand before you ever proceed. That would be my suggestion. I would also suggest that families not pay the REFERRAL fee until they have the official referral documents in hand.

So what's the bottom line?

If you have a bona fide referral you should receive documentation within 2-4 weeks. Once your dossier arrives in Ethiopia and the child has legally met all of the requirements for adoption your file is submitted to the court for a court date. You may receive a confirmed court date in as little as two weeks; however it can take up to 4-8 weeks from to get the court date. The court date may be scheduled 4-10 weeks out from that official notice. So, if you get a picture and a name but no medicals the child may not yet be under the guardianship of your agency, has not been seen by a doctor, and may not even have a clean medical history. I'm speaking in terms of those things that will require waivers. If this is the case, your agency will not be able to provide you with an official referral agreement until they are the guardians and have that record. If you do not have all of those things in hand you should not pay a referral fee that locks you in both financially and emotionally to a child that you may never be able to adopt.

I have read some really heartbreaking stories over the last few weeks and I hope that this helps at least one family that is lost wondering what may be going on with their process.

Where is Your Faith?

I know that I can't be the only person that has shed a few tears while going through this process. Some have cried buckets. First there were the happy tears and the excitement of every little thing like receiving a call back from the agency, getting a package in the mail or even writing one of the big checks.

SNAGS ALONG THE WAY
Maybe you have hit a few snags along the way. Maybe you have faced a mountain or tried to fight your way through a brick wall. I know that there have been days where you've said that it was all too much, that it was taking too long, that you wanted to quit. Maybe you were forced to place your plans on hold because family or financial circumstances have changed so drastically.

Maybe it was days of doubt and second guessing. Maybe it was looking for signs that you were on the right path and all you got were bright flashing red lights or stop signs or detours down one-way streets that led to dead ends. I know that there are families that have had long referral waits, missed referrals, lost referrals, failed court dates, and long delays before travel. The biggest heartbreak that I've heard is of families with referrals and the children passed away before ever reaching them. Then you have to try and wrap your heart around different child and a different picture than the one who's picture you originally fell in love with.

ALL TOO MUCH
Maybe I'm just talking about myself but there have been times that I have cried out and asked what is all of this for. Several days ago I woke up just in time to hear a television minister say, "God does not respond to our needs and wants, God responds to our faith." We can't bully him into our way of thinking either.

I had to remind myself that hope that is seen is not hope for if I can see it then what am I hoping for? This is a faith walk like no other to me. I know that I have some powerful sisters walking this same walk and feeling the same way. In our lives we have been able create spreadsheets and checklist; write the plan, work the plan, influence others to our way of thinking, and call upon our strong will and determination to make things happen, usually in our favor. I feel like I've met my match.

THE FAITH TO HOLD ON
And...at the end of all of this, what He has for us is what we have. The children that we get are the children that were destined for us at the beginning. They are those that were chosen just for us. They may or may not be what we dreamed or hoped in our minds. They may be older, faster, slower, louder, happier, sadder, taller, smaller, or more ill, more stubborn, more afraid or more hurt. They may be wore wise, more astute, more mature, or more intelligent. They may be more loving and more giving, more patient and more kind. More faithful, much stronger, more steadfast, and more sure.

My faith is in the knowing that while we are seeking our hearts desire, God is desiring our hearts to open and our faith to grow. That's not a lesson I'm giving to others, it is the lesson that I've learned for myself. This is not an easy path that we've chosen but it is our path. Everything that comes along the way is exactly what is meant for us. Trusting that is required.

I may wake up every morning with my mind on Ethiopia, but my faith lies in knowing that God's plan for me is far beyond anything that I could plan for myself. That's why I can't seem to understand every little twist and turn. Often I have to remind myself, it isn't about me anyway. It is about children who are hoping, dreaming, believing, praying and waiting.

FAITH OF THE CHILDREN
Maybe, just maybe God is working this whole thing out by their faith so it is the children's prayers that are being answered. Maybe they need one more day in the arms of nannies that have nursed them back to health. Maybe they want more time sitting at the table eating injera and doro wat. Maybe they need more time with parents, sisters and brothers that they will never see again and just need to feel the tender hands of grandparents that have to let them go. Maybe they need to hear how wonderful and special they are in their own language or play in the courtyards with friends who truly understand.

Maybe they are praying for parents that are strong enough, patient enough, committed enough, faithful enough, and loving enough. Maybe they are just not ready to leave the only place they've called home knowing that they may never return. Maybe they are afraid of what lies ahead or who is waiting for them. Maybe just maybe they want to fill their own hopes and dreams and not carry the weight of a country that hopes for them or parents that need them to close their own open holes. Maybe we can learn faith from them that have nothing, who can do nothing but trust all the adults that work on their behalf or have an abiding faith in their creator. Maybe just maybe it is not us that are waiting for them but they that are waiting for us to be prepared and not just ready or anxious.

Here is one of the songs that I listen to to keep me encouraged. The song is called, "Your Will" by Darius Brooks. One of the last lines in the song says, "I may not get everything that I want but I'm going to trust God every step of the way and he will lead me home."

Why Are You Adopting?

After being in this community for so long, I've heard many different reasons given for why people (should) adopt. Some talk about saving children and others talk about wanting to parent. I'm sure that both factor into the decision in some way.


I'd love to see at least 100 votes. Feel free to link to the survey.

more at twiigs.com...

Ethiopia the First Choice for Adoption

I've read several post recently from families that chose Ethiopia after they had pursued adoptions in other countries. I'm just curious how many families chose Ethiopia as their first choice.

more at twiigs.com...

Let us all know what other countries that you considered.

How To Choose An Adoption Agency?

more at twiigs.com...

Feel free to add comments about your decision.

The Adoption Name Game

I've written several post about names, naming, and changing names in the adoption process. In the last posts I was questioning the process of how to officially change the children's names. The official (document) name change will be needed even if I leave them with their Ethiopian given names. If you don't know, Ethiopians have one name and then their father's name is added as a surname. For my children this would mean that their documents would have CHILD'S NAME (Ethio given name), MY FIRST NAME (becomes their middle name), MY LAST NAME (their new last name).

If you read my post, Certificate of Citizenship Name Game, you know I was trying to figure out how to change this (correct this) on their documentation without re-adoption.

I finally received an answer from someone who completed the process here in Illinois. Thanks, Tara. Another adoptive parent explained that after bringing her child home on an IR-3 visa, she hired an attorney specifically for the name change. After receiving her Certificate of Citizenship, she paid about $900 to have him file papers with the county to change the name.

TIMELINE

• April - Home with child
• May - Certificate of Citizenship
• July - Filed in court for name change (can be done immediately)
• July - Court hearing
• Sept. - Court order
• Nov. - Record of foreign birth

This is still preferable to me than doing the re-adoption.

Blogs I Like

Tami's Baby Born In Her Heart
(Gladney) - Paper Chasing
This journal is being created so my daughter will never have any doubt from where she came, who she is and how much she is loved. Before I decided to adopt I lacked motivation, she motivates me and makes life worth living again.

Grace Has All These Reasons
(Gladney) - Waiting Referral
My beloved friends, let us continue to love each other since love comes from God. Everyone who loves is born of God and experiences a relationship with God.

Tracey's Single Mom Odessey
(Wide Horizons for Children) - Amara is home!
I am becoming a single mother through adoption, and I expect it to be quite an adventure.

Nancy Has An Abundance of Grace
(Christian World Adoption) - Joshuah and Naomi are home!
A single soon-to-be mom to two beautiful Ethiopian children. This diary chronicles my adventure in adoption and serving God.

Jocelyn's Ethiopian Princess
(Gladney) - Pacey is home!
On to my daughter's name which will start with the letter P. The meaning of her name also describes my Great Grandmother. I found a couple of meanings but this one is the best "Noble Woman".

Habesha Child - Elsa is home!
This is the story of me, a single California girl, raising my habesha child, to whom I refer in this blog as “E”. Habesha is a term of pride that Ethiopians use to refer to themselves.

Renee Wants To Bring Them Home
(Gladney)
After two years of trying to get pregnant we decided that there had to be a better way and I'm happy to say that our hearts led us to Ethiopia!

Straight Magic
(Wide Horizons for Children)
Chronicling the phenomenal twists of fate that lead us to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, to our family.

Waiting for Isa B
Single mama to a gorgeous girl born in the beautiful country of Ethiopia!

Dedra and Her Daughters
(Illien) - Kalkidan, Aster, and Bizuwork are home!
Dedra is home with her THREE girls from Ethiopia. Check in and watch the fun.

Ethiopian Triplet Land
(Children's Home Society & Family Services) - Home!
In case you haven't heard, we adopted 5 month old triplet baby boys from Ethiopia!!!

Adventures in Ellis Island
(Children's Home Society & Family Services) - Geremu is home!
Adventures in Ellis Land have taken place all around the globe this blog was established to share with family and friends the latest and greatest adventure in Ellis Land- PARENTHOOD!

A Sister Mom
(Hope Agency) - Baby is home and they are working on #2
I am just the average 19 year old college soph. that STILL lives at home and has convinced her mother to adopt two Ethiopian babies.

Bringing Home Baby Boy Preston
(Children's Hope International)
I have decided to proceed with adopting. The country was a no-brainer too. My heritage is Ethiopian. So Ethiopia it is!.

The Earley Journey
(Gladney) - Addison is home! This is the story of our journey to adopt our daughter from Ethiopia. We continue to rejoice in the trials, triumphs, and blessings that led us halfway around the world to our cherished child.

A Journey to Grace
(CHSFS) - Grace is home!
My hubby and I are adopting a baby girl(Gracie) from Ethiopia. This is the story of our journey to her.

Copies of Ethiopian Birth Certificates

If I am interpreting the information that I found on the Travel.State.Gov website, it is possible to get additional copies of the Ethiopian birth certificate while in the country.

• Issuance of birth certificate $2 or $7 for same day service.
  
• Birth certificates can be authenticated in Ethiopia for an additional $35
  

Certificate of Citizenship A Name Game

How do you prove that the children born in Ethiopia are now US citizens? For those of us born here we are often asked to produce our social security cards, state ID cards, drivers license, and birth certificate.

With an IR-3 visa my children will receive a Certificate of Citizenship automatically. Will that be enough? I was just reading that one of the big problems is that the COC that is automatically sent to the parents come with the name as stated on the Ethiopian birth certificate.

You can change the name on the COC -- for a small fee of course. To make a change to the COC, I will need to file form N-565 and pay $380 per child or $760 US dollars!

Now, how do you change the name and how much does that cost before you can request that the name be changed on the COC? More questions, more paperwork, more money.

Questions About Ethiopian Documents

After writing the post about re-adoption, I found this information about Illinois Senate Bill 180.

Senate Bill 180 simplifies obtaining a Record of Foreign Birth for a person born and adopted in a foreign country by allowing the adoptive parents to submit five items to the State Registrar of Vital Records:

1. evidence of the child's birth date and place, provided by the birth certificate (original or certified copy)
2. certified copy of the foreign adoption decree
3. copy of the IR-3 visa (immigrant visa issued by the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service for a child adopted abroad)
4. name and address of the adoption agency that handled the adoption
5. $5 application fee

Information above is from the Gitlin & Kaper Law Firm.

So here are the new questions that it brings to mind.

1. What is the process for getting a certified copy of an Ethiopian birth certificate? Is is possible while in Ethiopia to get a second copy of the children's birth certificate?
   
2. Do we only receive one copy of the foreign adoption decree?
3. What is the process for a name change?
   

Re-Adoption in Illinois

If it's not bad enough that the children once adopted in Ethiopia, travel to a new country, move into a new home with new parents, some states require re-adoption. Illinois is one of those states.

Re-adoption requirements are based on the type of visa the children received in Ethiopia. An IR-4 visa means that the children enter the country without permanent citizenship and receive a green card upon entry. In this case, citizenship is not automatic and re-adoption is required by law. Most Ethiopian children enter the country on IR-4 visas. A child will receive an IR-4 unless BOTH parents saw the child before the adoption was finalized in Ethiopia.

Early in the process I decided to get an IR-3 visa. I made that decision for two reasons. Primarily because Illinois has an additional requirement that an adoptive parent become a licensed foster parent and then readopt. To get an IR-3 visa means that I have to travel to Ethiopia twice. My father and I will go right after learning of the referral to meet the kids and do a little sight seeing. I will return to Ethiopia and bring them home after the adoption has been finalized. With an IR-3 visa the children are granted automatic citizenship and receive a Certificate of Citizenship.

Nothing in international adoption is ever as straight forward at it first seems. Here is the rub. With an IR-3 visa Illinois re-adoption is recommended:

• To get a US Birth Certificate. However, with an IR-3 visa you can get a US birth certificate through the Illinois Department of Public Health without re-adoption. IDPH requires surrendering the Ethiopian birth certificate in exchange.
  
• To legally change the child's name. If the new birth certificate is given by IDPH it will have the name as it is on the Ethiopian birth certificate. A name change would have to be completed in a separate proceeding.
• Jurisdiction. Some parents are concerned that without re-adopting the adoption may not be valid in other states (if they move). Though all states do not recognize foreign adoption, they do have to recognize an Illinois adoption.
  

Today the way that I feel, I would rather do a name change and get the birth certificate through IDPH. Tomorrow of course all of that could change.

Transracial Adoption -- What's Your Preference?

Get ready for an eye-opening experience.
Project Implicit has created a series of Assessments to evaluate whether or not one has a preference for one race, culture, skin-tone, or religion over another. It is really interesting in the way that you move the through the online assessment. You get your results immediately.

FROM THE SITE: Psychologists understand that people may not say what's on their minds either because they are unwilling or because they are unable to do so. The IAT measures implicit attitudes and beliefs that people are either unwilling or unable to report.

• Take the Assessment for Black/White Race Preference
• Take the Assessment for Skin Tone Preference
• Take the Assessment for Asian/White Race Preference
• Take the Assessment for Religious Identification
• Take the Assessment for Arab/Muslim Preference
• Take the Assessment for 2008 Presidential Candidates
  

A Shot In the Arm

What vaccinations are needed for traveling to Ethiopia?

I still probably have several months before my referral and travel to Ethiopia. It's time to go and gets shots. You have to start early because you need a series of shots and they have to be spread out over the months.

My father called to let me know that he had gotten his first shots. He's ahead of me and I'm okay with that. He paid someone $50 to stick him in the arm but he told me they used an extra sharp needle so it wasn't that bad.

Here is the run down of the shots that we need.

• Hep A series (2)
  
• Hep B series (3)
  
• Yellow fever
• Typhoid
• Meningitis or Meningococcus
  

We have decided to take the combined Hep A and Hep B shots. It means 3 shots instead of 5. I've also found out that county health departments are about half as much as going to travel clinics.

Is Adoption the Answer to Ethiopia's Problems?

In a recent question posed to adoptive parents, someone asked if adoption was really the answer to the poverty in Ethiopia? The questioner wanted to know if the money that we spend on adoptions would not be better used to support the families and keep the children in Ethiopia. The question stemmed from a concern that some children are being relinquished by parents who are simply too poor to care for them. Some adoptive parents struggle with the fact that many of the children are not true orphans (no family) as they had first believed.

My Answer: I don't think that adoption is an answer to poverty anymore than food aid is an answer to poverty. I believe that adoption is a way to place children in homes and change the course of their lives. At least to us it seems that way, but I believe that the course of our lives including the adoption was always a part of God's plan for the children, their birth parents, and for us.

I broke this into three parts. You can continue to read:

• An Adoption Plan for Moses
• The Master Plan for Our Children
  

Is Adoption the Answer to Ethiopia's Problems? Part 2 of 3

Part 1: The Question for Adoptive Parents
Part 2: Adoption Plan for Moses
Part 3: The Master Plan for Our Children

Moses Was Adopted and He Married an Ethiopian Woman

The Bible is filled with accounts of children and the circumstances of their births. One of the most known stories is that of Moses the Hebrew who interestingly enough married a woman from Ethiopia. When Moses, the Hebrew was born, to save him from certain death, his mother placed him in a basket and sent him afloat on the Nile River. She thought that she was sending him to safety.

As the story goes, Moses was pulled from the water by Pharaoh's daughter, the same Pharaoh that wanted to kill him and all of the other first born Hebrew sons. Pharaoh's daughter found the abandoned baby floating on the water. She pulled him to safety, adopted and raised him as her son. He was raised in the house of Pharaoh getting stronger. Without even knowing it, Moses was simultaneously being nursed at the bosom of his natural Hebrew mother while learning to be an Egyptian ruler. Think of the contrast of what he must have learned.

All of it was the unfolding of God's plan for Moses and his life. Moses who had been raised to rule and oppress, freed the same Hebrew people he had been raised to rule over. Instead of being the great ruler he is known for telling Pharaoh to let the people go. That was always God's plan.

God's plan was not altered because of the circumstances surrounding Moses but rather Moses was strengthened and shaped because of them.

Moses grew up and walked right into his purpose. He finally had a conversation with God where God finally reveals His plan. God tells Moses that he is to bring the people out of Egypt. Look at what God says to Moses in Exodus 3:17. I think is so consistent with this Ethiopian adoption struggle.

God said to Moses, tell them that:

• I have seen the affliction of my people in (Egypt)
• I know their sorrows and I have heard their cries
• I AM come down to deliver them
• I will bring them up out of that land into a good land flowing with milk and honey
• Come now, I will send thee into the land of (Egypt) to bring the children of (Israel) out of that land.
  

Are these all things that God might say about us in Ethiopia? What is important to me in this is that God makes it clear who is going to save and deliver. While God is working through Moses, the plan and the power all comes from God.

God called Moses to be a witness and a vessel but not the savior. That's how I feel about this adoption.

But, like some of the parents involved in the discussion, Moses wasn't sure that he was doing the right thing. He momentarily got caught up in all the issues that made this plan improbable. He could have wasted time asking God why his mother put him in the basket, why Pharaoh's daughter pulled him out, or how his mother could go to the palace and breast feed him. Instead, Moses confessed his uncertainty and ask God why him? Moses told God that people would want to know under what authority they should follow him. Just like people ask us why we are adopting.

And God said, "I will be with you. And this will be the sign to you that it is I who have sent you: When you have brought the people out of (Egypt)... - Exodus 3:12

He asked God what he should say and who should he say had sent him? And, in a way that only God can speak he told Moses to simply say, "I AM sent me to you!"

When my children begin to ask questions, this is how I will explain the story to them. I will tell them that God has a special plan for their life. Adoption is only one small part of that plan.

Is Adoption the Answer to Ethiopia's Problems? Part 3 of 3

Adoption Is Only Part of the Master Plan

All children are fearfully and wonderfully made. All for purpose, all with a plan, and all in God's time. Since we as adoptive parents are also children of the Most High, then he has a plan for us too.

Psalm 139 says that from the moment a child is formed in his mother's womb, God knows the child intimately. There is no height or depth; no distance, time, or darkness that can hide us from the plans that God has for us. In the scripture David talks about how overwhelming it is to know that God knew him so well and created him with a special plan and purpose in mind.

If you read Psalm 139 you will discover that it says that there is no hiding place, no way around the plan that God has ordained. So, that even a child in Ethiopia is not outside the will that God has on the child. And that I, here in America am not so far away that God cannot find a way to join us together.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139: 13-16

Some adoptive parents get caught up with or take issue with why the children are available, why the parents gave them up, whether or not the parents were fit or unfit. Some judge whether the parents reasons are good enough, whether they tried hard enough, or whether they might have found another option. I take no issue with the birth families. I love them for their strength and thank God for them daily.

It's easy for me because I believe that all the children are God's children and were created for his purpose. Children do not belong to us they come through us and are entrusted to us by God to care for and nurture until they fulfill His plan. I believe that the children in Ethiopia were always planned for me and for whatever reason they came into the world nurtured first by different parents until it was time for them to move from that place. That is why it is so easy to love them before ever knowing them. I could get lost in what, why, and how about the circumstances, but I decided to just trust God.

READ MORE:
After writing this article I did a Google search on adopted children in the Bible. I found this great article that also uses the story of Moses to help a child better understand adoption. You can read the article.

International Adoption Vocabulary

I have truly developed a new vocabulary that is specific to international adoption. Here are the top 10 new words and phrases:

1. Home Study - An unscientific study of your emotional and psychological fitness conducted by a social worker. It is all summed up in a report that includes information about your childhood, finances, illnesses (both mental and physical) and a physical look at your home. You'll never get a I-171 without it.
   
   
2. I-600A - An advanced orphan petition that you send to Homeland Security to get approval for bringing a child into the country. Please send check, marriage license, birth certificate and make sure that they are all certified originals.
   
   
3. I-171 - What you anxiously hope will come in the mail and what you would gladly pay extra to have expedited. It says that you have the official green-light of the government to bring a child into the country. It's the answer to the I-600A petition that they also cable directly to the country. It is the gold ticket at the Willie Wonka Chocolate Factory.
   
   
4. CIS - Is the Homeland Security immigration department that processes your I-600A and I-171 too slowly. That is unless you are in Boston. I read that someone got there approval in about a week. Don't count on it though. Check my CIS clock at the top of the blog. Tick...Tock...
   
   
5. Dossier - An elegant sounding name for a big stack of papers that require more paperwork that must sign, notarize, get certified, and get authenticated. I love that when you get a document notarized that then you have to trek to the Secretary of State or some government office so that the clerk behind the class window can examine the notary stamp and then certify or authenticate it. I don't really love it since I had to go twice. Why, you might ask? Because the woman behind the class said that the notaries stamp was not equally black inked on all sides. A story for another day. For others it's worse because they have to hire a Dossier preparer to do all of that and then they pay the preparer to send the information to Washington D.C. for more authentication. Oh yea, your dossier is not complete without the gold ticket!
   
   
6. Approved! - Maybe it is not a new word but it has real meaning now. You wait to have your initial application APPROVED, your home study APPROVED, your health status APPROVED, your I-171 APPROVED and your dossier APPROVED in both countries.
   
   
7. Referral - The word that we care most about, wait the longest to hear, think will never come, and is the answer to our prayers. If you're not waiting for one then it is the notification and identification of the child that we we will be adopting. It includes pictures, medical records, and history.
   
   
8. Court Date - This is a good court date provided everything goes through. It is the day that the Ethiopian courts finalize the adoption.
   
   
9. Travel Date - The date we wait for after waiting for the referral and court date. Can I please just go and get my kids? You can when you get an official travel date. But, you won't get the travel date until an Embassy date has been established.
   
   
10. Visa - It is what you fly half-way around the world to make it on time to the Embassy date to pick up. This is the visa that we get that allows the children to come home to the states. It's what you get when you get in country after you've gotten your referral, your court date, and travel date and after you've loaded too much of the wrong stuff and not enough of the right stuff in your suitcases. It is the first official thing that you do with the new children in their country.
    

The words and phrases that we really don't want to hear:

• delay
• wait list
• denied
• re-do, rewrite, resend, re-stamp, re-authenticate
• fingerprints
• FBI
• immigration
• I'm sorry...
• It's in the mail.

Please add your own, I know that there are more.

Pray With Us

We Ask For Your Prayers.
A writer described prayer of intercessors as "Love on its knees in prayer, for others. Pleading on behalf of the needs of someone else."

When you pray please pray for:

1. The CHILDREN. While adoption is an exciting time for me it can be a scary time for them. My children are so young (3 - 6) they may not truly understand what is happening to them or why. It is natural for the children to feel that they are being removed from everything that they know and being delivered into the hands of a stranger. Pray that God gives them peace, that He calms their fears during this time and that He comforts them. Pray that even as they transition from their natural families and travel from their home villages and into orphan care that they experience JOY that every child should have. Pray for their health and the hands of those adults that guard, nurture, feed, and care for them through this time. Pray that they have an easy transition and that they instantly feel the love and care of all those who wait to embrace them.
   
   
2. The ETHIOPIAN FAMILY. I am so grateful to the birth families that hold these children in their care until they believe that they have done all that they can do. No matter the circumstances, it is never easy to let go of your children or to entrust their care to strangers from a strange land. Pray for the strength and courage of my children's relatives. Pray that God gives them peace. But, these families and the families of the children need your pray that the land that they live on bare fruit, that the get access to water and resources that they need to sustain their lives. Pray for their VICTORY over their circumstances.
   
   
3. The MISSION WORKERS. Pray that God touch the heart, mind, and spirit of everyone that participates in this mission. For the nannies and drivers at the orphanages to the facilitators in the field. Pray for the strength of those on both continents that their minds might be focused on the needs of the children.
   
   
4. ETHIOPIA. Pray that God will heal their land, that he open doors that seem closed, and that he shine light where life seems darkest.
   
   
5. FAITH. This is truly a walk of faith. I'm grateful that the blessings have been many and that the setbacks have been few. Still there is more to come before the children make it home. At every turn pray that God increase my faith and the faith of all of those involved throughout this process.
   
   
6. FAVOR. Pray that God grant us favor through this process. I ask for your prayers of favor with the agencies, the social workers, the coordinators, the facilitators, the government bodies, and any person that I may encounter along the way.
   

After you pray, thank God for it is already done!