A Walk in the Clouds

Two of my three favorite lines from movies come from "A Walk in the Clouds." It starred Keanu Reeves who fell in love with a beautiful woman whose family had immigrated from Mexico.

To understand how that relates to this adoption, you would have to know the two lines and here they go:

• The heart wants what the heart wants.
• Just because I speak with an accent doesn't mean that I think with an accent.

There has been an ongoing conversation among adoptive parents about why parents choose the age range and sex of the children that they choose. The discussion revolved around the desire for girl babies as young as possible and how that could lead to corruption of the system.

I didn't enter the conversation because I guess that I feel that the heart wants what the heart wants. What is right for some might be all wrong for me. I'm not alone but I'm one of the PAPs that has no interest in adopting a baby. My request was for children over two and up to six or seven (leaning more towards the upper range). I hear parents talk about missing first steps, first words, and finding some security in the fact that they are the only parents their children will know. I'm not sure why those things don't matter to me at all. What is more important to me is that I can talk to you and we develop an understanding of what those words mean. I'm not sure if it is the many years that I've worked with children but I find that children at about 3, 4, 5 to be the most curious little people ever. I love their curiosity, I love seeing them discover new things and ask non stop question. Maybe I'm weird that way -- I just don't really get excited about babies. But, "little people" are a real sense of joy and wonder to me. Strangely enough I'm also just a little more drawn to boys (girls are great too).

The speaking with an accent thing. Here's why I love that line and have never forgotten it. It would be so easy for people to assume that children born into poverty, with little education, and no ability to speak English are some how less intuitive, curious, intelligent, or perceptive. Be they the children or the parents in Ethiopia their inability to speak my language does not diminish the pride that they have in who they are today. I was shocked a couple of weeks ago when someone suggested that these kids just "might not be that bright." I say don't let the tattered roofs fool you. With kids I think it is important to be a talent scout and look for what is possible in everyone of them. I can't wait for that.

My third favorite movie line..."They call me Mr. Tibbs!" If you've never seen Sidney Poitier in the movie, "The Heat of the Night" you are really missing something. You would have to understand what it meant for me as a little colored girl seeing that movie and hearing that line for the first time.